Did you ever want to rewrite the script, so that other people would behave the way you would like them to? I guess we all do this mental exercise in our personal lives, at least I know I do. I constantly imagine people doing or saying exactly what I had hoped they would.
I teach the adage that the only behavior we can change is our own. Even though I know this to be true, I often find myself crafting some lines for some of the people I encounter.
One of my clients has a communication style that is direct and impersonal. I literally rewrite her emails in my minds eye when I receive them. The ones I imagine she wrote are friendly and not brusque, they say thank you, nice work and express appreciation for a job well done. This reframing makes me laugh and allows me to have a more positive perspective about the exchange.
This past week, during an encounter with an employee at United Airlines in San Francisco, I couldn’t hold my tongue nor could I ignore her behavior. I simply told her what I thought she should have said. It went like this.
My client had purchased my airline ticket and since it wasn’t on my credit card I didn’t have priority boarding. I went up to the desk to explain that since I was a Premier Silver member, I wondered if she could issue a new boarding pass to get me in the second boarding group instead of the fifth. When she looked up my name she stated, and I quote, “You no longer have status. It expired. Guess you didn’t fly enough last year.” Then she looked down and I was dismissed, my status stripped.
I didn’t walk away. Instead, I looked her in the eye and said, “Oh Miss Stiel, it looks like your Silver status has expired a few weeks ago. Thank you for being such a loyal flyer to United. We appreciate your business and hope you’ll fly enough this year to qualify for our Premium status. I wish I could help you today. Unfortunately, I am unable to.” She said nothing. I left having said what I wished she had said.
The truth is, no matter what, I miss my Silver status.